"You are [or do things] so different from me. What's wrong with you?!?"
It is, I realize, an utterly ridiculous statement. And that's the point - I need to say it so that I can take a step back from myself and/or the situation and be able to laugh at myself. Because even if the statement is ridiculous, subconsciously I will probably think it. No matter how much Matthijs and I are alike and how much we care about each other, there will be [are] moments when we do/think things so different from each other that it causes frustration. And then it's easy to think/act as if there's something wrong with the other person. And then by learning to express that frustration in such a riduculous but still helpful way, I can better remember to be less quick to judge. And I am reminded to recognize that differences from my way of doing things are hardly inherently wrong, even despite the fact that they often bring challenges and sometimes frustration.
And as I continue to laugh at myself, hopefully I'll also remember that Matthijs isn't the only person in my life where this question might be helpful. Life in community draws me into close quarters with people who are very different from me, people whom it is also easy to judge that there is something 'wrong with them.' And it's easy to let that fester into something unhealthy. Learning to laugh through my frustration and being willing to see the challenges of living together as people who are different is also good for me. Knowing the blessing of living together well, the good things we as different people can bring together, makes the effort definitely worthwhile.