21 March 2023

Reading Ezekiel 16 and 23 in the Red Light District

A variation of the following was published in Global perspectives on the Old Testament (2014), edited by Mark Roncace.

Calling someone a prostitute is generally considered a great insult. In Ezekiel 16 and 23, however, Jerusalem is called more than a whore: she is considered to be worse than a prostitute as she scorns payments and bribes her lovers to come to her. Furthermore, the descriptions of her prostituting would make many readers blush. The prostitution of Jerusalem is clearly shown in the text to be a metaphor for Jerusalem’s chasing after other gods, but that hardly abates the prostitution motif. The question asked here is whether a fuller understanding of prostitution as a social phenomenon affects how the reader understands these texts.

When I moved to the Red Light District in Amsterdam a number of years ago, I was immediately confronted with women behind the windows who were selling sex. Wanting to know and understand these new neighbors of mine, I read studies on prostitution, read prostitutes’ own stories, and even had short conversations with the women as I helped bring coffee with the Salvation Army. I also tried to see my neighbors: from the skinny young blond model type to the Eastern European with limited Dutch knowledge to the grandmotherly types who seemed like they’d be more at home entertaining in the kitchen. It soon became clear to me that prostitution is complicated, just like the text of Ezekiel.

Based on its use in Ezekiel 16 and 23 it would appear that to act as a prostitute is unambiguously wrong and deserving of punishment, even death (cf. also Deuteronomy 22:21). However, the stories of prostitutes named in the Bible paint a different picture: Tamar was declared righteous (Genesis 38), Rahab was the only one rescued from Jericho (Joshua 6), and Gomer was bought back as Hosea’s wife (Hosea 2:5). Prostitution in the Bible, then, like the phenomenon of prostitution in society, is not simply seen as all bad.

Those working behind the windows in Amsterdam perceive their prostituting themselves in various ways: a necessary evil, an interesting and even enjoyable job, or one’s worst nightmare come true. For some, prostitution is seen as the only option (whether by force or general circumstances) and for others, prostitution is hardly their only option but the one they still choose because of the opportunities it presents. The description of Jerusalem and Samaria in Ezekiel 16 and 23 falls into this latter category, what is sometimes referred to as the “happy hooker.” In such an understanding of prostitution, the person is so infatuated with sex that prostitution would be considered the “ideal” and he/she could not imagine doing or wanting anything else. Jerusalem fits this category through her longing after foreign men, bribing them to come to her. Yet, describing Jerusalem as happy in her prostitution is going too far: she is constantly thirsting for more and despises the men after she has been defiled by them. The judgment depicted in the text—that of being stripped bare and stoned—further clarifies that, irrelevant of any claims made about Jerusalem’s willful intention in prostituting herself, she experiences too many “bad tricks” for her to be described as a happy hooker.

The other extreme is to see the prostitute as being inherently a victim—no one could willingly choose to have one’s body used by so many different men. Human trafficking, pimps, and loverboys have most likely forced and sometimes brainwashed the women into selling their bodies. Abuse, lack of self-worth, political unrest, addictions, and/or a love of money push women into prostitution. Seen in this way, Jerusalem and Samaria would be understood as having been brainwashed by these other gods: these are loverboys who had promised her their love, but ultimately just abused her and pushed her into turning to even more gods. This understanding clearly shows Jerusalem’s need to be rescued by God; yet, it seems difficult not to hold Jerusalem responsible, since her blatant guilt is one of the main points of these chapters.

Very few prostitutes fall into either extreme: For many, prostitution is seen as a means to an end. While few of them would consider prostitution an ideal job, they have made some choice in either becoming or staying prostitutes, even if leaving is exceptionally difficult. Few would argue that prostitution is healthy or good for them; it is harmful for their body, it messes with one’s emotions, and it is often demeaning. Yet, few are rushing to leave the life: the money is too good, the other options are lousy, and this is the life they know. It is in this context—the complicated reality of prostitution—that one can better understand Ezekiel 16 and 23. As despicable as the description of her actions is, Jerusalem cannot be simply despised and dismissed as a deviant woman. Rather, she is a complex character in a messy and complicated world, much like each of us and much like the women in the Red Light District. To some degree, Jerusalem was lured into prostituting herself by the other gods, unaware of the dire consequences, and she became a victim of her own bad choices. The text depicting her story is intended to shock the reader; the shock is even greater when we realize that we are being asked to identify ourselves as the prostitute in the story, as people who also whore after other gods. This identification allows us to turn away from condemnation and toward hope for restoration for both Jerusalem and ourselves. Jerusalem and Samaria have been promised that their fortunes will be restored in order that they, and those who identify with them, might remember and be ashamed.

In the years that I have lived in the Red Light District, one specific topic of conversation stands out. Visiting the women with a cup of coffee often leads to simple conversations about the weather, business being bad, children, and house pets—fascinating conversations, but it is not always easy to sense that the regular visits serve any kind of pastoral function. Yet, when a person decides to leave the work, then no matter how short or mundane the conversations previously were, there is no holding back in sharing this good news. There is a great joy in finally leaving—not only having survived the physical and emotional dangers of the work, but also anticipating the start of a new and different life. It is that joy and wonder that is missing from these chapters in Ezekiel; that part of the restoration comes only later in the biblical narrative.

15 February 2023

Preaching while Female

As a campus minister, I don't preach that often. Yet when I do preach, I travel around to different locations. This can provide several challenges as Beth Carroll describes in this article: No Shoes, No Pants, No Service 

People aren't always sure what to do with the fact that I have long hair and choose to preach in a dress or a skirt. The sound person that I work with is usually male, and they're not sure what to do if the headphone set gets stuck in my hair (because I didn't think about putting it up). Most are thankful when I remember to wear a dress with a belt, on which the microphone pack can then hang. Others are grateful that I'm okay with a standing microphone instead of risking a 'wardrobe malfunction' because the weight of the microphone pack might be a bit much for the skirt I chose to wear that day. 

But other than the awkwardness of getting me set up to preach, I've rarely had people comment on what I've worn. I'm thankful that I can choose to preach in clothes that feel comfortable while also appropriately dressy for the context to which I'm preaching. 

I don't want my clothes to get in the way of people hearing the message I believe the Holy Spirit has invited me to share with the church. At the same time, while I want to be respectful in how I dress, I also do not wish to hide the female body that played a role in my receiving and preparing the message. I certainly do not wish to be a distraction, but I also believe that hiding my body by conforming to a male-dominated standard and expectations is also an unhelpful distraction from how God speaks in and through different genders.

02 January 2023

Welcoming the new year with messy church

We welcomed the new year with my preaching on January 1st in my home church. While I'm not entirely sure if wrestling with a sermon is the best way for me to spend my last day of the year, I was thankful for yesterday's service and getting to preach. 

But I was also thankful that it was a bit messy, as that feels more true to who we are and what life has looked like these past few years. After all, we started off last year with most things closed down (again). And it feels like God meets us more in messiness than when we have our act together. After all, it is often only when I recognize my inability to do things on my own that I realize how much I need God to intervene, not only in and because of my failures, but also in every aspect of daily life.

And so I pray that my coughing at the end of the service didn't get in the way. Whether that be out of concern for how I was doing, as I struggled to stop coughing and finish the service, or whether it made others anxious that I was sick and potentially making others sick. Or even out of my own sadness that I coughed after taking the communion bread, as that association feels wrong (even if I realize that God is not always as digestible as we'd like God to be!)

And I give thanks for the second chair on the stage behind the pulpit and my child's enthusiasm in joining me there. And thanks that I belong to a church where she has been welcomed with joy so that I feel most people would be more delighted to see her up front than be distracted by how much she moves around. Next time, though, I'll make sure that she leaves the stage before I start preaching. Near the middle of my sermon, I felt her crawling by my feet and making herself comfortable under the pulpit (which is thankfully closed and actually a pretty cosy space for a child). Other than being a bit surprised, it wasn't that distracting for me (although I can imagine it might have caused some suspense to those watching me). 

One of the main messages of my sermon is that we are welcomed as God's people, that we are seen and loved, not just when we have our act together, but also in the foolishness and messiness of our real lives (see here for an earlier variation of the sermon). I find it a bit ironic (although fitting) that my leading the service got to be an illustration of that message. 

16 February 2022

The messiness of marriage and parenthood

Valentine's Day brought with it cards, cake, candy, and tulips. It also brought declarations of love from my four-year-old and my own thankfulness for all of the morning coffees (and accompanying snack) that Matthijs has brought me on all these days I've worked from home during the pandemic. 

Even as I am deeply thankful for my marriage and parenthood, I also recognize that parenthood is hard. So is marriage. I laughed aloud at the following description that Stephanie Phillips wrote about her own relationship:

"My pronouncements of [my future husband's] perfection stretched far and wide, or at least to my meager blog audience, who were treated to glowing stories about his strength of character and witty repartee. The way I saw it, he had saved me from (shudder) a life of singleness as one of New York City’s resident Cat Ladies.

Then we got married, and had kids, and now those cats don’t sound so bad."

In a season when we've spent a bit too much time together and I sometimes desperately just want time alone, those words resonate me. 

Yet, I'm also thankful that not only do I still have the cat (who follows me around the house, acting as my personal heater in my cold basement office), but I have a family who patiently allows me space to struggle through the challenges of being human and grace for me as I learn better how to love them and extend them the same grace they extend me. 


Phillips describes her own coming to terms with the messy reality of marriage in the following way: 

"Some readers (and reviewers) — most, if you read the comments section of that review — would be more comfortable with the fairy-tale version of marriage that we believed in when we were kids; the one I unwittingly expected when my own knight showed up to rescue me from spinsterhood. But at some point (usually around the first time one of you farts, or during a sleepless night full of infant screams and threats of murder), the wheels do come off, which is to say that you actually begin to see each other. All of each other. This is when grace enters the picture, because sticking around becomes a choice when both of your flaws show in the marked relief of everyday light. Which feels reminiscent of another kind of love I know.

“Sometimes you fear possibility itself: the possibility of growing into something more expansive and generous than you are now, growing into a shape that might look ugly from the outside but feels beautiful from the inside,” writes Havrilesky, who is describing marital love but could be documenting my own interaction with God’s grace over the years."

For more of Phillips' words about marriage in response to Havrilesky's recent memoir, follow this link.

06 January 2022

Presumed covid

While pandemic life has always been a bit uncertain, it feels like we've reached a new level in our house this week. Anyone living in Ontario with covid symptoms this last week (and trying to figure out the new PCR testing regulations) can probably relate to our family's conversations: so I think the little has covid? so we should probably isolate, right? should we use one of our last rapid tests on her (and if so, swab throat or nose)?

We can't actually get a PCR test for her. We do have 2 rapid tests left - and used one to get a negative result on Sunday (when we first heard her cough and we wanted to be safe in leaving the house), but is it worth trying again? 

The same document tells us that if you're not eligible for testing, then "if you have any of the symptoms listed below, the individual is presumed to have COVID-19 infection and is advised to self-isolate." And yes, the little has had a few symptoms: a nasty cough, some chills, a runny nose, extra fatigue, and even some shortness of breath a few days ago. Even if it's not covid, whatever she has is unpleasant and shouldn't be passed on to others. (Matthijs and I thankfully haven't gotten what she has). 

As for how much it matters - well, there are now new regulations for isolation: "If the individual is fully vaccinated OR is a child under the age of 12 years old, they should self-isolate for at least 5 days from symptom onset AND until their symptoms have been improving for 24 hours, whichever is longer in duration." Unfortunately, we didn't realize we all should have started isolating sooner - because we're still adjusting to the new rules - but tomorrow will be day 5. On top of that, our one housemate is mostly managing the inconvenience of staying out of contact with us (and the other has yet to return), and the little is slowly getting better. She's well enough now to enjoy being sick and so she fake coughs every time we ask her if she's getting better - so that she can avoid school and stay in her pyjamas all day. 

So I presume everything is okay and we're doing the best we can with the information we have - but I think I'd still like to know. Perhaps because I have a lingering sense of getting covid as being connected to some moral failure (even though I know that's wrong). Or perhaps simply because I'm tired of trying to make the best decisions when I don't feel like I know enough.

03 January 2022

Strength for the ordinary

As we face another January that is shaped by a pandemic and pivoting, my prayer is that I would be able to trust that God would give us enough strength and hope in all of it - and that I might see the joys of the world around me, even if it's only the proud exclamations of my child's colouring of a Paw Patrol character (or a lunch picnic in her bedroom). 

A poem by Lisa Rieck about Mary's response to the angel's news, posted at InterVarsity's Well, resonated with me - about the challenges of living into what we are being asked to do. I can be filled with adrenaline for a new challenge, but it's a lot harder to actually follow through with a project and to keep my heart open to hope and love.

The following is an excerpt:

"In that moment, 
our holiness soars to its feet, ready to 
greet whatever epic task was just passed to us.
 
It’s the next moments that matter...
 
when no one knows what to say to a girl who
claims her seeming disgrace is actually 
good news of grace for the world.
 
I hope then that I will still 
be the Lord’s servant, opening 
my hands to welcome, like a 
womb, the Word that is being fulfilled." 
Lisa Rieck 

I encourage you to read the full poem here.

14 October 2021

Chaos until Thanksgiving

Every job has its seasons of chaos and calm. With campus ministry, summer is usually a time of calm, while September is chaos. The pandemic has only increased the chaos for us, as we've been figuring out how to gather safely in-person. 

One of my campus ministry colleagues would argue that things should shift around Thanksgiving. Before then, our lives and ministry could be chaos. We should expect to be busy with organizing and meeting. With the beginning of the year, we should expect extra hours and extra chaos. But it should always be something temporary. Experience had taught us that (Canadian) Thanksgiving was a reasonable date to shift away from the mindset that overwork is normal. Instead, we should be paying attention to re-creating sustainable rhythms and to rest enough. by doing that, we are more able to be present for those coming to us, to be able to imagine and wonder what God might be asking for us, and to have the energy to deal with the inevitable (and temporary) crises that will still come up. 

I'm so thankful we've reached Thanksgiving. I'm ready for more sustainable rhythms and more wondering.