18 August 2020

The lie of depression

The following is part of a series of posts that I found in my draft and are only now publishing.

The Banner published an article last year on depression that describes some of the difficult complexity of depression. What I appreciated most about it was the author's description of depression as a lie:
"Depression is a shape-shifter and it is a liar. The lies are probably the cruelest part of the illness. It tells you that everything you’re feeling is your own fault, or that what you’re experiencing isn’t real and the pain is only in your head. If you just tried harder, it says, the noise in your head would stop and your soul wouldn’t ache.
Depression is a lying illness, and its most sinister and dangerous lie is that this darkness around you will not end, that the pain is permanent, that there is no relief.

It lies. It lies about the most important truth that all new things begin in darkness, that dawn comes out of the deepest night, and that if the light isn’t there yet, then sometimes you have to reach into the darkness and pull it out." Theresa A. Miedema, "Me and the Black Dog" 
I am a bit disappointed, though, that she seems to emphasize what we have to do in the midst of depression - here it sounds too much like it is my own hope and my own strength that get me through depression. That, too, is a lie. At the same time, I can see how it is hard to talk about God's presence in the midst of depression, as it is hard not to blame God. Yet, the vision she gives of God at the end of the article -"a God who sees you, who knows you in all your passion, in your good moments and your bad moments—and who welcomes you as God’s beloved" - ought also to highlight how God can handle and even welcomes all of your anger and disappointment about how God is not intervening more powerfully to heal.

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